Portal Breach: The Collision of Worlds :: v.4.0


    A Fishy House Call

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    Minion
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    Re: A Fishy House Call

    Post by Minion on Mon Sep 04, 2017 1:10 pm

    Even Minion found the choices of vegans to be odd! Fear's opinion on them was obviously quite negative. Shrugging his robotic shoulders lightly, the fish gave his two cents on them. "If they choose not to eat meat and milk, that's their choice. Not a smart choice, but it's their right to eat what they want. I just don't understand how they think it changes anything." A metal hand gestured vaguely in the air. "Just because they don't eat steak doesn't mean no cow will ever be slaughtered again! All of those products are still in the stores, supplied to the people who do consume them. Makes all the complaining and belly-aching kinda...useless." About as productive as yelling at the sky, at least. As far as he was concerned, the ghoul had the right idea. As long as the animals were looked after and killed cleanly and kindly, there were no issues in his book!

    His comment had been made in jest, though Minion found himself quickly interested in what Fear thought of it. Joints popped grotesquely and he couldn't help the twist that came over his fishy face, features churning in light disgust. Eugh...good old rigor mortis. Slim metallic digits tapped against each other as the wave of revulsion ebbed away. "Aha..." It was instead replaced with apprehension. Gifted with higher thought, but plagued with it as well. Certainly a darker take on it, but the alien found he could not deny the truth of it. Did not Goldie, simple as she was, find happiness in merely swimming in a tank and eating fish food? Certainly a less disturbing life than the one he led for so long. "O-oh, I prefer the company of uh...well, civilization!" He offered the former man a toothy smile. "I haven't found a fish yet who's made for good conversation. Not even my own pet goldfish. If I lived in the ocean with schools of fish... I think I'd wind up pretty lonely." Such was the life of Minion.

    Onto less depressing matters, Fear's paramour sounded like a difficult case. Such impudent behavior caused the fish to chuckle, shaking his...well, whole body, as if in disbelief. "What a stubborn man. Makes the fact that you're trying to make him soup even...nicer." It showed that despite the attitude, the ghoul cared for him. It almost reminded Minion of some of Roxanne and Megamind's antics, though Fear spoke up and jarred him out of memory lane. "O-oh. I thought it'd be...the respectful moniker." He explained, tone sheepish and light. Although the corpse had hired him to be something of a teacher, the other man was technically his temporary boss. Such a role deserved a bit of formality and respect, didn't it? "If that's what you prefer! You've got it, Fear!" Minion relented with an awkward smile. The name alone was odd but to use it so personally... Well, as long as that was what he wanted. A name was a name, after all!

    Mincing ginger was apparently the job Fear was made to do, as the ghoul seemed to expertly hack and slash away at the root! The fish observed his pupil's work with a proud stance and grin, mechanical arms folding behind his back. Bits of the root flew through the air in a rather messy display, but it was nothing to be concerned about. The uh...the gleeful rasp on the other hand...

    "Hu hu! Jussst like chopping a man'sss neck,"

    Was it possible to gulp when you lived in water and breathed through a pair of gills? Science be damned, Minion felt himself swallow thickly. Tendrils wavered in an anxious pattern and the fish alien suddenly directed his attention away from the chopping. "I'm uh, glad you're enjoying yourself!" Just don't think about it, focus on the meal. His attention drifted to the Dutch Oven, metal joints squeaking softly as the alien shuffled over to keep a steady eye on the broth. Not much longer, just let him get a few more hacks and slashes in!
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    Re: A Fishy House Call

    Post by Fear on Wed Jan 03, 2018 9:07 am

    Eh, choices... As far as Fear concerned himself (and quite shallowly), he viewed the notion of free will as a double-edged and oftentimes clumsily-wielded sword. "Giving the uneducated masssssesss a voice and an option to pursssue isss a fool'sss recipe for disssassster. Take thisss notion of veganisssm," he rasped solemnly, gesturing with a rotted hand. "You know asss well asss I do that choossssing to abssstain from a life of meat and animal productsss isss nothing more than man'sss folly againssst nature herssself. It isss the illussssion of choice, for you are again right; one vegan, let alone a thousssand, will not make a difference in the natural order of thingsss. Prey isss to be consssumed by the predator - meat to be consssumed by the hungry. Thisss isss how it hasss been sssince time immemorial."  

    An otherworldly chuckle rumbled throughout the kitchen. "The living can be quite ssstupid, no?" It was followed by a succinct pause. "...No offenssse to you, of courssse." Right, Fear always seemed oblivious to present company.

    "O-oh, I prefer the company of uh...well, civilization! I haven't found a fish yet who's made for good conversation. Not even my own pet goldfish. If I lived in the ocean with schools of fish... I think I'd wind up pretty lonely."

    Oh? Now this was a decadent thought for the mind.

    "Ha ha! The woesss of not being a psssychic, hm?" Fear glanced up from his work, whatever it may be, and decided to humour his aquatic instructor. "You would be pleasssantly surrrprisssed," he hissed. "A great many of God'sss creaturesss posssssessss thought, however simple it may be. Mossst do not coalesssce their thinking into the ssspoken word, but I do believe desssiresss and emotionsss are rather ssstraightforward enough. I underssstand your plight, though." Transitioning between a civilized mind and a more animalistic one proved cumbersome at times, even for a veteran psychic such as himself. "Ah well..." Fear shrugged and went about his business, grotesque hands occupying themselves lest they become the Devil's playthings. "Life'sss easssier when you are more ignorant to itsss maddening pitfallsss. While I am not privy to the finer minutiae of your current exissstence - at leassst, not without psssychic intrusssion - I believe you are handling yourssself well enough. There isss little reassson to fix what isssn't broken, yesss?" Best to leave things as they were and let the pieces fall into place.

    Chop chop chop! WHACK! Chop chop chop! WHACK!

    The ginger root hadn't a hope or a prayer as Fear made short work of it, the air smelling heavily of spiced earth and the general aura of the kitchen brightening. Wielding a knife had that effect on the helmeted ghoul. "Oh yesss, he isss quite ssstubborn," Fear agreed, nodding stiffly along. "But it isss that sssame dogged conviction I love ssso. If only more were like him..." Alas! He wiped his knobby mitts on a nearby towel and finished mincing the ginger. Otherworldly eyes looked to Mitchell expectantly. "Yesss, that isss true, innit? Missster isss ressspectful. However, you need not trouble yourssself with formalitiesss; I am not particular." Not anymore, that is. "How isss the broth? Isss it coming along nicely?"
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    Re: A Fishy House Call

    Post by Minion on Sat Jan 13, 2018 4:56 pm

    Despite the ghoul being something of a more...stern and strict figure, Minion still found himself in agreement. Humans were meant to be omnivorous! Canines had developed in their mouth for a reason, surely not shredding greens to pieces. No, those were flesh ripping teeth. Just as Minion himself had a mouth full of fangs! "The meat industry is very flawed, but the answer is definitely not just boycotting the products. They just don't have enough power, like you said." If the choice is an illusion, is it even worth trying to pretend otherwise? After such wise words, Fear promptly stuck his foot in his mouth! ...Was there a mouth behind that helmet? Woof, that was a black-hole of a thought. Best steer clear of that one! "None taken! I have my ditzy moments, so..." The fish shrugged, hardly affected by the potentially insulting words. Back when Megamind was a villain, he remembered thinking the citizens at large were stupid for ignoring or hating his friend and brother! Besides, how did the saying go? A person is smart, people are dumb.

    Fins fluttering lightly, the alien fish hummed curiously at the idea of being psychic. To hear the thoughts of others? Well, that would solve a lot of interpersonal issues but seeing hidden thoughts was a bad idea. It was like flipping through somebody's diary! However, the power would come in handy to help communicate with the average fish! What thoughts lied within Goldy's head, or even Cleo's...? "I've often wondered about the thoughts of animals and wished I could hear them...but I don't have any experience with psychic powers. Or any powers! I'm just an alien fish in a robot suit." As if to demonstrate, Minion wriggled within his tank. "I guess it's better to just accept things as they are and...try to make some lemonade where you can, right?" Nothing was 'broken' now that he'd escaped from that impostor, and he had rebuilt his life into a better one. There really was nothing more he could ask for! Though now it made him wonder about Fear's own life. Psychic powers were a hefty responsibility. Requiring much discipline! What was it like...?

    Only the sound of violent chopping could jog the fish, who stepped a bit closer to observe. Bit by bit, the smell of the chopped liver cycled through his vents and allowed him to 'smell' it through the water. "Aah..." Minion sighed appreciatively. He quite liked the scent of ginger! Oh, but how intriguing. Fear's lover was a stubborn thing, but the conviction he carried in his heart was a trait that the ghoul loved! The fish's smile turned crooked, mind flitting to days gone by. "Conviction seems to be a desired trait in romantic partners. I think that was one of many reasons why Megamind fell in love with Miss Ritchi. She was a very sweet woman, and if she made a choice or decision...she stood by it wholeheartedly." She was most certainly not submissive or hysterical.

    With a nod to show he understood Fear's wishes regarding how he be addressed, the fish soon gasped and stepped back to the broth. "Oh right, right!" Looming over the Dutch Oven, his fish eyes stared at the contents with a critical eye. "Hm...! I think it is almost ready! It's just about to simmer, I just need to...aha!" Robotic fingers grabbed the sprigs of thyme delicately, setting them down beside the broth. With a 1/4 teaspoon ready, Minion held the sprig aloft. His metal digits pinched the plant at the top, before slowly sliding down and dislodging the leaves to trickle down onto the counter. Most of them found their way into the measurement spoon, and the rest were swept up in his hands and plopped inside. "There. Bring over the ginger and the pan of roasted veggies. It's about time for us to put it all together!" Within the Dutch Oven was the tell tale burble of a simmering fluid. "I hope you don't mind if I remember this recipe for a nice, winter day." It almost made him hungry!
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    Re: A Fishy House Call

    Post by Fear on Thu Feb 15, 2018 3:37 am

    Aye, ole Fear was a cynical bastard. He believed that if given a chance, a person was wont to repeat bad habits and ill judgement. Such is the nature of mortals - flesh-and-blood creatures driven by their impulses and prey to temptation. "Alasss," he sighed, "ssso the indussstry ssshall remain until necesssssity ordainsss change. Asss you've no doubt realized, a perssson isss sssmart and people are - frankly - dumb." Psychic, remember? But yes, it was best to kindly (ahem) forgive the ghoul's faux pas.

    "I guess it's better to just accept things as they are and...try to make some lemonade where you can, right?"

    Wiser words never spoken. Although...

    Decrepit sinew and bone loudly groaned as the towering undead pivoted upon his rancid heels to better face the toothy alien. "Perhapsss," Fear mused. Otherworldly eyes bored into his instructor, gleaning Minion's unguarded thoughts... his dreams... his fears... "If it cannot be helped, then yesss. It isss bessst not to rile the hand of fate. But if you have the power to invoke change..." Ah, now there was a novel thought, wasn't it, dear instructor? A knowing chuckle escaped the shambling cadaver's throat. "Methinksss, teacher, you are cognizant of thisss principle better than mossst. There isss no ssshame in making lemonade out of life'sss many lemonsss, but complacency leadsss to a dreary, bitter exissstence. Why sssettle for the ssstatusss quo when you can accomplisssh more?" When you can grasp the recognition you deserve? The ghoul left his words at that and decided Minion could read in-between the lines. He was, after all, a clever fish. Far too clever for the banal life of a nanny.

    "Yesss, I do recall thisss Roxanne Ritchi. My partner hasss interacted with her ssseveral timesss in the passst, asss with thisss Megamind." An odd name, that. But certainly no odder than the discrepancies flitting about Minion's thoughts. There had been a Miss Ritchi and then... not, according to the alien. His recollection of the brunette was strikingly different to that of Kev's. The contradiction elicited a desire of yearning... of resentment. How interesting... Fear knew better than to pry, however. "Faith isss crucial in any relationssship, platonic or otherwissse," he rasped, staring down at their progress thus far. This soup was coming along quite nicely! "Without faith, there can be no trussst. And without trussst, there can be no faith. It isss... regrettable that many ssseem incapable of either." A great many things were regrettable, unfortunately. Alas! These were woes for another time, a time where Fear was not in the presence of his cooking instructor, and he eagerly carried out Minion's order with posthaste. "Here you are," he remarked, stiffly offering the goodies. "The vegetablesss and ginger, jussst asss you have requesssted. And of courssse! You may adopt the recipe and ussse it to your heart'sss content. In fact, you may even bring home a bowl if you ssso desssired. I am certain my partner will not mind." Er... assuming Minion could eat a bowl of soup, considering he lived in a... well, bowl.

    ...Could he?
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    Re: A Fishy House Call

    Post by Minion on Thu Mar 01, 2018 10:04 pm

    "Human life was honestly better before the population had such a boom. People bought their meat locally, animals were raised on a farm and fed normal food. Once the world got bigger, it's like the standards were lost." Minion had been something of a stickler, very particular about where they got their food from. The fish preferred home-raised goods but sometimes you just couldn't get that on a supervillain budget! As for the intelligence of people, the alien gestured towards Fear with an agreeable nod. "Oh yes, nowhere is that more true than in a city! A person is clever, but people tends towards mob mentality." Roxanne Ritchi had more wits than the average Metro City citizen.

    Fear's movements were very...frank. He snapped. He crackled. He popped! Being a very little guy, Minion didn't have creaky bones or loud joints. The poor ghoul sounded as if he might keel over at any moment and the sound had him flinching within his tank. "Change...?" The fish echoed, the instructor quickly becoming the instructed. He mulled over the words and found himself bobbing in the tank slowly. "Too many lemons make life sour. You're right, that sometimes we cannot simply make due with what we have. Breaking the status quo was...hard. Stressful." A metal hand clasped over the center of his chest, and a fin reflected the motion. The deal with Prixlezub had been hectic, as scheming with demons would usually bite one in the butt! But instead, he'd found freedom. He had to lie to faces that resembled his loved ones, tiptoe around them and make an escape. Yet, every step was worth it. A smooth smile stretched across Minion's face, fangs poking through. "Now, I don't need to make lemonade. I have water, and it's never been clearer and more fulfilling." The smile widened, amber eyes squinting at the corpse. "I even get to help make a special dinner for a couple!" He wouldn't trade this new life for anything.

    "Yesss, I do recall thisss Roxanne Ritchi. My partner hasss interacted with her ssseveral timesss in the passst, asss with thisss Megamind."

    Aaand there went the peace. Minion sucked in a deep gasp of water, grimacing openly as his little heart began to pound frantically within his chest. Fear's partner knew them! He knew the fake Roxanne and Megamind! Robotic hands began to fan at his glass 'face' frantically, the fishy alien hyperventilating a tad. This was fine! This meant nothing! Back in the day, Roxanne and Megamind had been the talk of the town, friends with most everyone! The populace at large didn't know any better, thinking the couple was on the level. But they weren't. Calm down, Minion. This didn't mean everything was up in flames! If he went to pieces over everyone who had even been aware of the two of them...

    Bit by bit, the fish alien calmed himself down until he was no longer hyperventilating. He offered Fear an awkward grin. "S-sorry." Feeling too close to people who used to know the couple made Minion feel as if a giant searchlight was beaming through the glass. Such was the anxiety of living a lie, always waiting for the ball to drop! Ah, but Fear was preaching to the choir. Because lack of faith and trust was why the fish's relationship with Megamind fell apart! "It can be rare to find, which makes it even more precious." Much like how the ghoul knew better than to ask, Minion too knew better than to inquire about who in Fear's life was incapable of having faith. The soup was far better to focus on! "Thank you, Fear!" With a shiny (if watery) smile, he held up a spatula and tilted the pan towards the dutch oven! With deliberate movements, he scraped the roasted veggies into the broth and topped the mixture with the ginger.

    "Oh, thank you kindly! I've admittedly worked up an appetite after fixing all of this...it smells really good." The bubbling mixture within the dutch oven spoke for itself! Eating soup was a little tricky, but Minion usually tried to spoon it directly into his mouth, if not catching it the moment it dropped into the water! Though it could definitely get dirty. Changing water out was a bit of a chore! "Alright! This will cook for ten to fifteen minutes, and then we blend it all up! And top it with..." Ah right, the bacon. He swiveled towards the timer, metal body creaking lightly as Minion bent down to better see it. There were still about twenty minutes left! "When this says there's ten minutes left, we can check the vegetables and see if they're done! The bacon still has a bit to go before we get to chop it up... Perhaps we can get out the blender!"
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    Re: A Fishy House Call

    Post by Fear on Thu Apr 19, 2018 3:07 am

    "Human life was honestly better before the population had such a boom. People bought their meat locally, animals were raised on a farm and fed normal food. Once the world got bigger, it's like the standards were lost."

    You know, Minion had a rather astute head on his fishy... shoulders? Gills? ...Something? Point being, the alien spoke wisdom and Fear himself quietly nodded along in agreement. "I do prefer farm-raisssed or organic asss well," he rasped. "Not for myssself, of courssse, but for my partner'sss health and for the animalsss." A strange admission, especially from one such as Fear, but he wasn't always obtuse. Not everyone had the dubious luxury of becoming a superfiend, after all.

    Suddenly, the air began to change; to stir and saturate with emotion. Heartache... Resentment... Peace... Enough so that the decrepit ghoul looming before Minion lapsed into a silent reverie. His motions froze, Fear seemingly trapped in the ebb and flow of time. He saw them, yes. He saw the figures of Megamind and Roxanne; of Prixlezub and the desperate bid on Minion's behalf for freedom. It had been tumultuous. It had been frightening. And it had been liberating. After what seemed like an eternity, Fear at last spoke. "You did the right thing." The remark was simple yet profound; a reassurance to soothe whatever doubts plagued Minion's thoughts. This did little, however, to combat the wave of anxiety rippling out of the diminutive alien. "Goodnesssss," Fear commented openly, taken by surprise. He rigidly turned on those leathery heels and observed Minion perform his best rendition of a frantic headless chicken.

    "Hu hu! Relax, relax... No one isss aware of your sssecret identity," the helmeted fiend calmly pointed out. Though... "Methinksss, however, that you ssshould come clean eventually, mm. The more you uphold thisss charade, the more you will grow paranoid of thossse around you. I ssspeak from experience." Sadly...

    Fear fanned unpleasant thoughts of his own aside, and literally did the same with Minion's nervousness. "It isss alright," he hissed. "Your sssecret isss sssafe with me, Mitchell Finley." In hindsight, that last name was right on the nose, bloody hell! In any event, the soup. It was almost done, Minion seemed certain of it, and naturally Fear grew more excited by the second. "Good, good!" he commented, teetering over the alien, otherworldly eyes aglow with a burning intensity. "My partner ssshould be home from work sssoon, and I very much wisssh to sssee the look of sssurprissse on hisss face." An embarrassed pause one moment later. "...My cooking isss rather hit or misssss." But not this time! Oh no, this time Kev was going to have a lovely home-cooked meal that wasn't questionably edible. And speaking of edible... While the ghoul went to fetch the liquidiser, an idea struck Fear's rotted noggin. He reached into a nearby cupboard and withdrew a straw; it was long and made of a thick plastic, like one would find in cups and goblets from carnivals or special attractions.

    "Here we are," Fear rasped, setting the goodies down onto a kitchen counter. "I brought out the liquidissser and a ssstraw to eassse your consssumption. You may borrow it, if you wisssh. I know it will be awkward for you to eat with usss, essspecially given your condition." When it came to aliens and their incredibly odd eating habits and quirks, Fear was no stranger. In fact, he liked to fancy himself prepared for anything!
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    Re: A Fishy House Call

    Post by Minion on Thu Apr 19, 2018 5:08 am

    Being something of a caretaker for many years had given Minion a good amount of knowledge! Megamind's intelligence was undisputed when it came to science and technology, but the fishy alien had become learned in the ways of Earth. "No shame in that. The research has proven that organic and farm-raised foods are the most healthy option!" Not to mention the most expensive option as well, at least on Earth. Then again, what wasn't expensive in America? "Do you cook for your animals, too? I like to pamper Cleo with a cooked chicken breast occasionally. She loves it." A little smile grew at the mental image of such a frightening ghoul serving fresh steaks to his many dogs. What an interesting man, very loving and sincere despite what his appearance may suggest.

    Minion had been so frozen by his own tumultuous thoughts that he didn't realize Fear was just as battered by them. That's right, the man could read minds! Which meant if someone was freaking out around him...geez. Shame flooded him, trying to focus on Fear's words of reassurance. The right thing, the right thing. His betrayal had to be done, every other attempt to get through to that impostor had been useless! The alternative was to remain beneath his heel, forever picking up after two grown adults who seemed incapable of doing anything for themselves! No wonder they disappeared without me. The spiteful thought was sudden, but strongly felt even as shame came after like a wave following a tsunami. Between that and the fear that he'd be revealed... The alien's robotic body leaned upon the counter heavily, a hand flattening against the smooth glass of his tank. He focused on his gills, letting them ebb and flow to allow himself to gasp in the water. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry..." The fish apologized immediately, cringing at his own reaction like a scolded child.

    "Methinksss, however, that you ssshould come clean eventually, mm. The more you uphold thisss charade, the more you will grow paranoid of thossse around you."

    Another wave of anxiety crashed against Minion, though this time he tried to get himself under control. Focusing on his breathing, the fish twisted his body from side to side in his best imitation of a shaking head. "I don't-I don't think I can... I've already been lying for so long! Even if nobody holds it against me, what if the people who do remember me from back then..."

    "I've heard a lot of nannyfish talk."

    "Megan acts more like ya his babysitter."

    "Does he have any tracking device on him? [...] And you haven't installed another one on him?"

    Thanks to Megamind, the majority of the populace had only known Minion as being Megamind's 'nagging nannyfish'. If he revealed himself, told the truth? Would all of his progress as Mitchell be torn away, leaving Minion forever cringing in the blue alien's shadow? Forever known as 'nannyfish'? "I-I'm scared." An apropos admission to give to a man named Fear. Portal X really loved his irony, didn't he? At least Fear offered his support, pledging to keep Minion's secret to himself. The fish gave the man a half smile, truly appreciative for his secrecy. He slipped easily back to his work, and the ghoul seemed reinvigorated once he realized how soon their hard work would pay off! The strange slits in his helmet were aglow, bright as a sun. Even the sensation of the man looming over his shoulder draw a soft laugh from Minion. He was like a child who'd made his first dish! "Well, I personally guarantee that this one will be a hit. Or your money back!" Despite what a strange being this man was, his excitement was a bit contagious!

    While Fear gathered up the materials, Minion continued to keep watch over the simmering mixture to make sure it did not overcook. This dinner was coming along nicely! When the ghoul returned with the blender, he had the most curious little accessory as well! The fish tilted to the side within his tank, inspecting the straw. What was that...? Oh! He smiled brightly. "That'll work perfectly!" How marvelous, though he'd need to make sure he didn't nibble the plastic with his fangs. Chuckling sheepishly, Minion's hands worked to set the blender up. "Yeah, I suppose spooning soup into the top of my head at the dinner table wouldn't be the most incognito move." Once the blender was plugged in and the top removed, their only obstacle now was the ticking timer. Amber eyes flicked from it, to the crock pot, and finally to the ghoul who'd hired him. "...You're right, you know. I can't possibly live like...this, forever." He motioned to himself, the holographic disguise. "I enjoy being Mitchell Finley but eventually...eventually, the truth will come out. And it will be better if it came from me." Robotic arms were pulled snugly towards himself, metal fingers curling around an elbow as his body language made the robotic body attempt to seem as small as possible. "I'm just...not ready yet."
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    Re: A Fishy House Call

    Post by Fear on Sun Jul 01, 2018 2:18 pm

    "Hu hu!" Did he, Judge Fear, an omnicidal spirit of the law, stoop so low as to feed slobbering mongrels pieces of meat? "Of courssse I do!" he hissed excitedly. "I may not be a capable cook in my own right, but I can sssear a piece of meat with moderate sssuccesssss. Our mangy muttsss aren't sssnobbisssh enough to upturn their nosssesss at a fressssh chunk of sssteak." The cat, however, had much higher standards and was not easily appeased. Thus, Minion had his answer.

    ...Oof, that wave of crippling shame. And with a delectable hint of spite?

    It was the perfect cocktail for an unnatural spirit who fed on negativity, but Fear didn't fancy himself peckish. "Nonsssenssse," spoke the helmeted ghoul. His ethereal voice rose above the alien's tumultuous inner demons with ease. "Thossse worthlesssss ssscrotesss abandoned you becaussse you could no longer be controlled. That'sss how it worksss, sssee. You were only worth their time and resssourcesss if you obeyed. You are sssadly not the only one who'sss sssuffered thisss unfortunate phenomenon, mm." Lord knows Kev's been through it plenty, and as for Fear himself? Eh... it seemed brotherhood wasn't as infallible as originally believed. Jealousy and envy were a cancer of the soul.

    "I don't-I don't think I can... I've already been lying for so long! Even if nobody holds it against me, what if the people who do remember me from back then..."

    Interesting, but not enough to dissuade Fear's opinion. "And?" It was a simple question, though undoubtedly the catalyst to the unraveling of Minion's deepest... darkest... fears. How fortunate he was cooking with a literal embodiment!

    "You worry too much about the what-ifsss and the maybesss," he tutted. Reminded the ghoul of someone else he used to know; best not to woefully reminisce, however. Fear instead shambled beside the alien, standing abreast with Minion, and leaned back against the same counter top. "You won't go far in life if you let your fearsss dictate your life. In thisss, my ssscaly friend, you are once again dooming yourssself to yet another massster. Do you not wisssh to command dessstiny yourssself?" Of course Minion did, or else he wouldn't feel so scummy the way he did. "There will be thossse who remember you. Of thisss, I am certain," he stated, matter-of-fact. "But why doesss that matter? Why doesss anyone'sss opinion of you matter? It isss your life, your actionsss, and your feelingsss. If you carry yourssself with high esssteem and noble purpossse, I doubt thossse who truly care for your perssson will dissscard you like yesssterday'sss rubbisssh. You need only have faith in them and their judgement." And that, dear Minion, was the test of one's eternal soul. Many could not overcome their own inadequacies, and their failure resulted in broken relationships with peers and lovers alike. Will you commit the same misdeed? Or will you rise above and repair what has been frayed?

    A pensive hum escaped the ghoul's rotted throat, but Fear let the matter rest.

    For now. It was, after all, Minion's trial.

    He rigidly nodded at the alien's observation. "Yesss, but ressst asssured: I will make it ssso that my partner doesss not rudely inquire. He can be rather... trying that way." To put it politely. For someone who didn't have an actual mouth, Kev could be quite incessant.

    Now wrote:"...You're right, you know. I can't possibly live like...this, forever. I enjoy being Mitchell Finley but eventually...eventually, the truth will come out. And it will be better if it came from me.

    I'm just...not ready yet."

    Earlier wrote:"I-I'm scared."

    How eerily... familiar. Enough so that a decrepit hand rested gently on Minion's shoulder. "You will know what to do, in time. It isss not sssomething that comesss to usss until the right moment presssentsss itssself," Fear reassured. "Until then, continue maintaining a wholesssome, lawful exissstence. I think you can handle that quite well." Nothing like a handful of faith, hm?
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    Re: A Fishy House Call

    Post by Minion on Wed Jul 04, 2018 7:19 pm

    Aaw... That was a lot of meat to sear but Minion was sure that the canines appreciated it! The pack of dogs certainly seemed like a happy crew. "That'd have to be one mangy mutt to refuse steak!" Downright spoiled! This fantastic fish definitely appreciated the chance to have a good steak every once and a while. Fins fluttering in the water, he grinned at the helmeted fiend. "If you ever wanted to give your dogs something more, cooked eggs are very good for them! A great source of protein and it keeps their fur shiny too!" Perhaps he could dig up a cookbook of animal safe recipes? If Fear was interested, of course!

    "That'sss how it worksss, sssee. You were only worth their time and resssourcesss if you obeyed. You are sssadly not the only one who'sss sssuffered thisss unfortunate phenomenon, mm."

    "...I'm not?" Minion blinked (don't try to figure out how that happens for a fish), chewing his upper lip thoughtfully. What a strange realization, that he wasn't the only one to have a relationship become...poisoned, like this. Diluted and toxic because he couldn't obey blindly anymore. The fish remained quiet for a moment, fiddling with his metal fingers. Whoever it was that Megamind and Roxanne had become, they were loathsome and disgusting people. Like cumbersome leeches that wanted to bleed Minion dry. The worst kind of leeches too, trying to beg and smile. Offering to change and never letting go. Faking his death really had been the only way to escape.

    What if, maybe, possibly, could be... It was true, there was no lie to come from the ghoul so far. Fear stayed his hand and deterred rational thought and action. Minion was so afraid, but of what? And who? "I do want to be the master of my fate..." But sometimes it was so hard. Megamind had been his direction for so long. All of his life had circled the man, and now? He felt adrift at sea, without any life preservers to grab onto. Why did it matter if people remember who he was? Why did it matter if people asked questions or demanded to know where he'd been? The fish seemed to shrink in on himself even more, brown eyes closing firmly as he pressed against the back of his tank. "It matters because...I know people liked him. People were friends with that Megamind, like I'd been! When I left him, I had an idea..." He paused to take in some water. "I thought, 'what if I revealed myself? Waited for everything to cool down and revealed him for the snake he was?'. B-but I couldn't... Back then, there were so many people who were still so close to him. An entire agency, before that blew up on itself! They wouldn't believe me. A-and...I'm not sure if those left behind would."

    Minion was not used to being solitary like this, left to his own devices and seemingly without someone to back him up. All of his faith had been thrust onto Megamind, and look at how that turned out? The alien he loved and cared for became...a stranger. An abusive one at that! Like someone who'd burned his hand on a pot, he hesitated to reach out for fear of being hurt again. But...one day he'd have to. Perhaps...some people, like Zurg and Jo, could be trusted. Perhaps even the Inn keepers would be fine with it! The robotic body relaxed with a firm whir, and the fish let out a breath he didn't realize he was holding. "Things will...only turn out bad if I let them, right? If I keep my...er, head, afloat, then I can survive. I can't... control how someone will react to the truth. But I can control how I react to them! As long as I'm not doing anything wrong, there's nothing to get mad about. And if they do get angry...that's their problem, right? Otherwise... I can have faith that some people won't hate me for this. I did what I had to do." And that was the gospel truth.

    Boy, who knew that he'd be getting a good pep talker after being hired to help this ghoul fix a meal? How unprofessional! Minion chuckled nervously, smiling a grin that showed off every sharp fang he possessed to the man. "An inquisitive guy, huh? I've suffered worse, but...thank you. Maybe the soup will keep him too busy to ask questions!" Wishful thinking, perhaps, but it was worth a shot! Either way, he would let Fear handle his curious partner!

    A large hand rested itself upon Minion's robotic shoulder. The fish tipped to the side, briefly observing the hand. With skinny fingers and a large palm, they were hands that weren't meant to be underestimated. Still, he redirected his gaze up to the ghoul's helm and smiled. "I think you're right. I think I can handle it too! I will...do what I have to, in time. But until then, I can absolutely live a lawful life!" He spun in place happily, swirling the water within his tank and letting it splash against the glass. "And if you need future cooking lessons, I'm your fish!" Fear was a fairly attentive student, eager to learn, so he'd eagerly come back for more lessons if needed!
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    Re: A Fishy House Call

    Post by Fear on Sat Aug 04, 2018 4:20 pm

    Hm, cooked eggs... Fear rested a yellowed talon against the grating of his helm and weighed the idea against Kev's psychological stigma of eating anything with a shell. On the one rotted hand, the dogs could benefit from a lovely coat. On the other, Kev. Decisions, decisions, decisions. "I will consssider it," he eventually replied, neither accepting nor discarding the notion. Perhaps, if there was a sale at the local supermarket and if the eggs were wholesome, Fear would feel inclined to spare a few credits. A guard dog must be a healthy dog, after all.

    "...I'm not?"

    Alas.

    Fear shook his head calmly. "No, I am afraid not," the superfiend rasped. "Sssometimesss, thossse who are the closssessst to our heartsss are alssso the onesss poisssed to caussse it the greatessst achesss. Like you, I had sssomeone dear to me - sssomeone whom I trusssted with all my sssoul. They could not quell the demonsss within their breassst, however, and eventually sssuccumbed to jealousssy, disssappearing entirely without rhyme or reassson." There was no need to name names, nor reason to blemish the past with childish derision. "In the end," Fear sighed, "we may have the misssfortune of depending on ourssselvesss and what we know to be right. There isss no ssshame in branching away from toxicity; in fact, you will be better for it. Thisss isss your life, hm? Methinksss it isss time you embrace it." Minion's apprehension was perfectly understandable. His old friend had acquaintances of his own, and they would undoubtedly visualize an entirely different portrait of the man known as Megamind. But how many of these persons were left, however? How many would recall Megamind fondly, knowing that the blue-skinned alien was nothing more than a memory and a name upon the wind?

    "Things will...only turn out bad if I let them, right? If I keep my...er, head, afloat, then I can survive. I can't... control how someone will react to the truth. But I can control how I react to them! As long as I'm not doing anything wrong, there's nothing to get mad about. And if they do get angry...that's their problem, right? Otherwise... I can have faith that some people won't hate me for this. I did what I had to do."

    The helmeted undead simply nodded, the ethereal lights of his eyes winking mysteriously. "It will do your friendsss no favoursss by hiding in ssshadowsss and refusssing to confront reality. Ssso long asss you ssstay true to your heart and explain the sssituation with conviction, thossse who underssstand your plight will underssstand your courage in the face of adversssity. Remember, do not grow complacent in thisss charade lessst you prefer a convenient lie over the undeniable truth. Ssso many have made thisss missstake and I believe you better than that."

    As for the nosy busybody that was Kev-Mak-Tarr? A soul-rattling chuckle escaped Fear's decrepit throat. "I will make certain to dissstract hisss incessssant poking before it growsss into a nuisssance, rest assssured. And if he ssstubbornly persssisssstsss, I will give him a good thump upssside the head."

    Hear that, Keptoya? Mind your bloody manners.

    Aw, bless the little guppy's heart... Minion was spinning around in his water tank and looking like the happiest little clam. A very toothy clam, but a happy one nevertheless. "Good!" A hearty pat on the alien's back was damn near enough to give sway as Fear shambled to a nearby cupboard, fishing out a pair of ceramic bowls. "Though I am loathe to admit, I could do with a few... lessssonssss," he admitted. The comfort of the grave wasn't always without consequences, but too late to reflect on that now. "Do you have a bussssinesssss card? A phone number, perhapsss? We could make thisss a monthly thing if your ssschedule isss permitting. And you will of courssse be paid for your time, no worriesss about that." Maybe they could even have a lesson together, Kev and him? It sounded like a cute idea!
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    Re: A Fishy House Call

    Post by Minion on Thu Aug 16, 2018 9:05 pm

    Minion bobbed in place within his tank, smile ever present. "Alright!" It was, after all, Fear's choice. These were his dogs, and it'd be up to him to cook up the eggs! If he'd rather save the food, that'd be just fine. His pooches would survive without any eggs. The fish himself enjoyed giving his cat a special treat. A shame that Goldie couldn't be fed a nice cooked chicken or even veggies... Well, she seemed pleased enough to have her fish flakes!

    "Sssometimesss, thossse who are the closssessst to our heartsss are alssso the onesss poisssed to caussse it the greatessst achesss."

    How deep! Such was the threat of getting close with others. Allowing someone to know your innermost secrets and thoughts could give them ample ammunition that the average villain didn't have any access to. The alien listened with rapt attention, mouth dropping with a small gasp when Fear admitted that he too, had been hurt by one he loved. To think, such a strong and otherworldly being understood exactly how he felt. Although Megamind hadn't been consumed by jealousy, he was consumed by an odd fixation on being taken care of by everyone and completely unable to understand how to give as much as he took. Disappearing entirely...sounded very, very familiar. Minion frowned, mechanical knuckles rap-tap-tapping together. "I'm relieved you know how I feel, but it is a shame to be betrayed someone you trust so much." As nice as it felt to have someone who understood, it didn't feel quite worth it when the fish knew how much that hurt.

    Yet, Fear had a home! He had a pack of dogs, and a partner. Whoever had harmed him so, that pain still lingered of course. But...his un-life had not ended. It continued, and it was obvious that the ghoul had found some new meaning to it. He had embraced his new life... and as Fear urged, it was high-time for Minion to embrace his own. "I don't really know what my life is...without him." He turned away, looking off to the side to avoid the metal helm. "My purpose in life was to look after him, and care for him. And now..." There was his cat, at least! And his little goldfish. The alien wasn't entirely alone, but there was a lack of direction. "I do enjoy doing these odd jobs at least...it helps me to meet all sorts of new people!" But it was clear that he was spinning in circles, otherwise. With a soft sigh, gills fluttering lightly, Minion pursed his lips. "Perhaps a good start...would be someday getting my own place to stay. So I can be completely self-sufficient, right?" Cleo would certainly enjoy room to stroll around! Goldie would enjoy...a bigger tank, maybe?

    Useful as the holographic watch was, it was clear that Minion had taken to it as something of a security blanket. Being able to hide behind a normal human disguise was so tempting. But, no matter how long he lived as Mitchell...he would never really be Mitchell. As Fear said, he'd have to confront reality. And if there was no Megamind to take responsibility for what he'd done, then Minion might as well step up and be truthful. Certain people deserved the truth. "Well...it's a good thing I know where to start." Jo and Zurg, of course! A humbled demeanor came over the fish, smiling lightly as his antennae wriggled. "You really think I'm better than that? Even though we only met today?" That was a lot of faith and trust to be given!

    Chuckling to himself, Minion winked with a toothy grin. "And if that fails, there's always the couch!" With Fear to handle his partner, perhaps this dinner would be fun! It wasn't often that he sat down for dinners with people, after all! A whole room of people was too much to handle, but if it was just Fear's partner... The fish could survive a few odd looks.

    A firm pat made the water in his tank slosh against the glass, Minion swaying as his gills tilted to keep him steady. "No shame in that!" He replied to Fear's admission cheerfully. Staring at Fear's back as he gathered the bowls, he gasped excitedly. "Oh, I do!" With the press of a button, a plate on his robotic arm lifted to reveal a little pocket of space. Inside were some extra credits, the key to his room, and a little stack of business cards. Slender digits pulled one free and held it out for Fear to grab. The paper was colored a light shade of green, with black ink printed on the front. It gave his disguised name, a phone number, and his room number at the inn. After the ghoul took the card, Minion rubbed the back of his tank sheepishly. "I got a nice deal  at the printing shop, might have purchased too many business cards! They were just so darling. As for my schedule, I should be able to work you in each month!" A consistent job! The fish beamed, spirits lifting more and more all the time!

    Shifting at the hip to check the timer, he perked up eagerly. "Oh! Time to check the veggies!" Armed with a fork, Minion lifted the top off of the Dutch Oven and prodded once of the squash chunks. There was a good amount of give to it, meaning it had been cooked quite well within the pot. "Alright, these are done! The bacon's still got ten minutes to go, which should give us time to blend these up. It'll take about...two or three batches to blend up everything!" Turning the Dutch Oven off, he lifted it up easily and pouring some of the broth into the blender, forking the squash chunks inside of the appliance. As the batch passed by his tank, Minion gave a brief sniff. Try not to question the logic too much! "Mmm...~ It smells delicious! Can't wait to try this." Setting the pot back down, the fish placed the blender top on and glanced over at Fear. "If you're sensitive to loud noises, you might want to cover your ears." He waited for the ghoul's okay before pressing the button.
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    Re: A Fishy House Call

    Post by Fear on Thu Sep 27, 2018 3:15 pm

    "I'm relieved you know how I feel, but it is a shame to be betrayed someone you trust so much."

    It was surprisingly more common than Minion thought. And, much like the finned alien chasing hopelessly at his metaphorical tail, the undead knew exactly what plagued Minion so. "If you already know what your life'sss purpossse isss, then life would be rather dull, wouldn't it?" The details were of course scary, and the unknown was down right frightening. Still! Now that certain obstacles were out of Minion's way, the fish could rightfully explore what was his. "Obtaining your own place of resssidence isss a good ssstart, yesss," Fear agreed. "It will teach you perssssonal resssponsssibility and ssself-reliance. Methinksss you will find the challenge refressshing." And naturally rewarding, for what greater pleasure was there than to overcome a task and grow stronger because of it?

    "Yesss, I do think you are better than that." A decrepit talon reached over and tapped against the glass of Minion's suit - tink tink tink! - before doing the same to Fear's iron helm. "Psssychic, hm? While it isss true we've only met today, I feel like I've known you for an eternity." A blessing and a curse, but such was the price of youthful enthusiasm.

    "And if that fails, there's always the couch!"

    Ha ha! The very thought tickled Fear's fancy. "Oh, I will banisssh him to the ssshed," he rasped, accepting the alien's business card. Hm! Light green with black font... Reminded him of something else - something highly inappropriate for their conversation - as Fear brought the card to the fridge and pinned it there using a magnet. "Once a month isss good," the superfiend nodded. Knobby fingers rearranged a few of the more unruly magnets before Fear stiffly pivoted on his leathery heels to face his guest and mentor. Not even the grave could cure OCD. Anyway, time to talk shop. "What are your ratesss? Do you go by hourly or per diem?" Whatever the fee, money was no object to the ghoul. Seriously, what would Fear do with money besides spend it on Kev, Livewire, and the animals? "Ooh, the veggiesss..." Right! This soup recipe had vegetable chunks in it. Those weren't going to see much action, but perhaps the dogs would enjoy them? It should be hard for them to resist bacon-flavoured anything.

    Seeing how he'd just be getting in the way of Minion's expertise, Fear stepped aside and did what was told. He clasped both hands around the sides of his helmet and stood there like a gangly tree. "Okay, you may power on the liquidissser." It's not like loud noises bothered the ghoul, but the action gave him something to do while awaiting the next step in their lesson.

    To be honest, he was becoming more and more giddy at the idea of Kev happily squealing once he walked through the front door, having sniffed the fruits of their labour. It was so very hard not to be impatient!
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    Re: A Fishy House Call

    Post by Minion on Fri Sep 28, 2018 2:05 am

    "If you already know what your life'sss purpossse isss, then life would be rather dull, wouldn't it?"

    ...Huh. An interesting perspective on it! But how it light up the corners of the fish's mind, like a tissue paper that caught fire! "I've...never really thought of it that way!" Life with Megamind, working as his minion, had gotten a little dull when they were villains. The two barely had time to be heroes before coming here, where they were more average and accepted! His previous purpose had been like a road map for his life, always leading him straight to the path he'd expected. Scary as it was to lose that sense of direction... It gave him the power to chart his own course. And now, it actually sounded like something worth seeing through! His life wasn't glamorous, but it was the one he chose. This job, the one he'd picked! And that had a power all its own! Minion gave the ghoul a toothy grin, fins fluttering excitedly. "I think an apartment would suit my pets and I quite well! We don't need an entire house for just us, although that isn't to speak ill of a home like this one! It's very homey!" It definitely felt lived in, an atmosphere of love seeping from the walls.

    tink tink tink!

    Blinking curiously at the noise, Minion tilted until he was floating upside down. Warm brown eyes were centered upon the yellow talon rap-a-tapping upon his glass! He grinned again, an expression that looked to be a grimace from his current position. "Oh right!" An interesting power, though perhaps tiresome. Did Fear feel such a connection with everyone he met on his daily routine, or just visitors such as the alien fish? "How useful. I'd say it makes you a great judge of character. Who would I be to argue with your psychic results?" All this time, he thought encountering a psychic meant invasive probing of the mind. Yet, this felt quite...reassuring! What a nice fellow this 'Fear' was turning out to be.

    Righting himself within his tank, the alien handed over his card and chuckled deeply. "Ohohoho! Then for his sake, I hope he will behave!" Banishment to the shed was a heavy punishment! Ignorant of the ghoul's dirtier thoughts, Minion nodded in agreement. Once a month, a good arrangement! His eyes followed Fear's journey to the fridge, where his card was safely pinned for future reference! The tidying of magnets drew a soft snicker from him. It was a laugh of solidarity of course, the fish frequently found himself fixing things up within the inn. Sometimes he simply couldn't move on until something had been fixed! As for rates... Robotic fingers nestled themselves in the closest approximation the alien fish had to a chin. AKA, the area where glass met metal plating.

    "Negotiable. I figured, it depends on what I'm doing. See, if someone was hiring me to help them build something, then I'd probably charge hourly because that's a lot of work and very time-consuming! And if I'm being hired for a large catering event, I'd want to charge the same way. But, for teaching you to cook and helping you make a meal for your partner? I'd say 'per diem' would be fair. That way, we don't need to feel pressured about how long we take. A flat, even rate across the board!" He gestured with robotic hands, slicing the air horizontally. "That can be negotiated too! If I had to pick a potential amount, perhaps...15 credits? Maaaaybe 20?" Metal shoulders shrugged. Knowing that Fear was eager bring him back every month helped greatly! Charging hourly for one time, lengthy projects made sense whereas something personal and reliable like this deserved a simpler payment plan. In his fishy eyes at least!

    The sight of Fear standing there, with both of his hands clasped around the side of his helm like a little kid, it almost made him laugh! A stifled snort escaped before he cleverly pressed a button on the blender. Hopefully the loud WHIIIIRR! would hide his humor! Small blades within the blender hacked and sliced at the chunks of vegetable. Minion kept a vigilant watch, leaning in close to judge the squash! Instructions called for it to be blended until silky smooth, a process that wasn't immediate. It didn't take long for him to get the results he wanted though! Soon the orange liquid was without any chunks at all! The fish gave a victorious grin, and poured the contents out into a proper pot to serve the soup in. As before, he forked more of the vegetables in with a dash of broth. This was repeated until every bit of the dutch oven's contents had been blended! And no sooner had the blender been turned off did the timer let out an obnoxious little ding! "Mind pulling the bacon out of the oven?" Minion turned to his student. "I know you're gonna like this next part...!" After how ghoul absolutely murdered the squash, he knew the fiend was going to enjoy chopping up the bacon!

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    Re: A Fishy House Call

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