Portal Breach: The Collision of Worlds :: v.4.0


    A Fishy House Call

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    Fear
    Fear
    Exabyte

    Exabyte

    Posts : 1288
    Join date : 2013-09-04
    Location : The comfort of a grave
    Level : 60

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    Re: A Fishy House Call

    Post by Fear on Wed Jan 02, 2019 7:35 am

    "Fear! For...future reference you should...put on oven mitts when you remove food from the oven! I guess since you're...undead you can't feel it but it's a good habit to get into! You don't want permanent burns on your hands, do you?"

    ...Oh, whoops! Knew there had been a detail he overlooked.

    The decrepit ghoul looked at his rotted mittens, so to speak, and was largely unfazed by the addition of a few angry burns. It's not like he could feel physical agony, let alone smell the delectable aroma of cooked rancid flesh, but he certainly detected more than a fair amount of disgust and horror emanating from Minion's fishy little mind. The living could be so easily distressed! How ever did they manage the macabre...? "I sssuppossse not, no," Fear ultimately relented, seeing no reason for an argument. As a gesture of good faith, the shambling cadaver fished around the drawers for a pair of extra-large oven mitts (they had a cute lizard print!) and tugged them over his gnarled fingers. His talons naturally peeked through the fabric, having already established holes from prior use. It was almost as if the ghoul was wearing a set of adorable bear paws...

    "Yesss, I will chop the bacon and leave no fatty corner untouched!" Using a knife in the kitchen was Fear's favourite part, second only to piggybacking off Kev's sensory feedback. He withdrew a particularly large cook knife and promptly went to town without further provocation. Chop, chop, chop! Hiss, hiss, hiss! Yes sir, this was the life - er, unlife - and it was bloody good fun. A shame about having no actual blood to splatter, but a clean kitchen was a happy kitchen (and also a happy, blood-free Kev). "Ssshall I prepare a tupper for you asss well?" Fear inquired, the otherworldly lights of his helm still transfixed on the strips of his poor, unfortunate victims bacon. "Apologiesss, but I have forgotten whether or not I extended thisss offer. Being a creature borne of the grave can be quite problematic when everyone elssse isss ssso concerned with the niggling likesss of time and everyday minutiae. I'm sssometimesss amazed I even remember the namesss of the daysss and monthsss, ha ha!" He paused in his fine mincing to better study the alien standing beside him. "...Who are you again?"

    Fear suddenly erupted with bone-chilling, house-rocking laughter as the undead superfiend delighted in his own brand of ghastly humour. "I am joking, I am joking," he clarified, the room quaking from his deep rumbling of a chuckle. "It'sss very much like that, though. If ever you desssire to ssslip beyond the veil and tassste eternity, I cannot ssstresss enough that you ought to carry a calendar or watch wherever your wanderlussst takesss you. If you don't, you risssk losssing perssspective of the world happening all around you."
    Minion
    Minion
    Gigabyte

    Gigabyte

    Posts : 148
    Join date : 2010-09-26
    Location : The Inn, Room 344
    Level : 38

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    Re: A Fishy House Call

    Post by Minion on Wed Jan 09, 2019 9:51 pm

    Burns were never a pleasant sight, but you could make that double for angry burns marring green undead flesh! The smell was especially awful, though Minion did his best to be polite about it. He took a gulp, shoving his disgust down into the bowels of his little fishy body, and offered the ghoul a shaky grin. Fear relented, reaching over for a pair of oven mitts. "Oh cute!" The discomfort melted, Minion distracted by the cute pattern. Their oversized nature and the way his talons peeked through premade holes made him look oddly adorable. Fins fluttering excitedly, he offered a more confident smile. "Much better. Thank you, Fear! I look forward to seeing those handsome little mitts more often." No more burns for you, good sir!

    As expected, Fear went to town on that bacon. He unveiled a particularly large knife and got to chop chop choping! The strips of meat easily broke beneath the sharp metal, making for a nice crumble! His pupil's enthusiasm was very welcome, as the recipe definitely called for a good amount of chopped bacon! "Yes please, a tupper would be lovely." He bob-nodded in his tank as he reached for the fridge. A bulky arm reached in, and the whipped cream was pulled out! The plastic top was pried up with a soft crinkle, and the fish alien used a spoon to give the cream a good stir. "I believe you invited me to share in the soup, but I don't think you offered to give me a tupper!" He reminded, not unkindly as he peered over a broad robotic shoulder. Apparently being an undead creature gave one memory issues! Who knew? ...Well, obviously Fear did. Did all undead beings suffer from similar issues? It made sense that the brain wouldn't quite work at a hundred percent for something that was alive yet dead.

    Such a discovery didn't keep him from being concerned when Fear seemed to forget who he was entirely though! The fish alien paused in his stirring, caramel brown eyes widening as he stared back at Fear's helm. "O-oh...I'm...uh!" Before any imaginary sweatdrops could start dripping down his glass, the ghoul began to laugh uproariously, chuckling up a storm beneath that iron armor! Minion relaxed and gave a crooked grin as he joined in the chuckling. "Well, it's good that you can joke about it! I don't know if I would ever become undead...but I'm not exactly against it either. I'll cross, or, uncross that bridge when I get to it!" He gave another firm stir of the whipped cream before deeming it ready. Losing perspective of the world...the fish could certainly understand that, as his retreat into isolation sometimes felt like that. But obviously, being undead made the idea a bit more dire... He turned about within his tank, brows raised curiously. "How do you keep yourself from losing perspective? I imagine you use more than just a calendar..." How else could the ghoul nurture a relationship and a home without slipping through the cracks of eternity?
    Fear
    Fear
    Exabyte

    Exabyte

    Posts : 1288
    Join date : 2013-09-04
    Location : The comfort of a grave
    Level : 60

    Character Sheet
    Defense Bar:
    65/65  (65/65)
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    Stamina Bar:
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    Re: A Fishy House Call

    Post by Fear on Sun Jan 13, 2019 8:33 pm

    Smell was one of those things the grave took, along with taste, feeling, and a general sense of time. Not bad, considering the benefit was immortality, eh? Gaining psychic abilities was just a wonderful 'bonus', much like Minion's palpable disgust. A raspy chuckle escaped the shambling cadaver's throat. "Hu hu hu... Yesss, they're rather darling, aren't they?" he agreed, holding up the mittens. Fear couldn't rightfully see them, of course, but he could glean the details through Minion's eyes. "My partner hasss a thing for lizardsss, and I'm not really one to deny him thisss fancy. Methinksss you both would have sssimilar tassstesss." And, knowing that scaly tart, he'd absolutely flush a bright emerald at having his oven mitts called 'handsome'. What a goober!

    "Yes please, a tupper would be lovely. I believe you invited me to share in the soup, but I don't think you offered to give me a tupper!"

    Ah, damn the curses of the grave! The ghoul thought he had covered this subject before... "The offer ssstill sssstandsss," he hissed, pausing in his ruthless slamming of the knife. Die, bacon, die! The crime is being too delicious, the punishment is...! A righteous cooking for the enjoyment of Minion and Kev, because Fear sure as hell couldn't enjoy it himself. He looked up, the blade held firmly in his rigid hand. "If you wisssh to ssstay for a bowl, we'd love to have you. But, if not, that isss fine too. Your choice, mate."

    And that had been a rather good joke, hadn't it~!? Well, okay, perhaps a smidgen morbid, but what would you expect from an animated corpse? "Hu hu... Well, I reckon mossst folksss do not turn undead, no," Fear answered. Hm, the bacon looked proper chopped, didn't it? No reason to mince it any further. "Thanksss to thisss world, you may never have to crosssss. You can ssstay eternally alive if you wisssshed. Or, by that sssame token, eternally undead. A conundrum in and of itssself, no?" Portal Breach was... funny like that. A real anomaly that even had Fear by the ropes. "Asss for losssing perssspective, you are correct in thinking a calendar won't do much good. Sssuch material thingsss rarely make a difference, mm..." So, then, what did? He thought about it for a moment, maybe two, and decided to remain truthful to the question and to Minion himself. "Yourssself," the ghoul replied. Ah, but that was painfully vague. Who could make sense of that? Here, take another bone.

    "And by that, I mean you keeping up to date on what'sss important and not falling prey to the common likessss of sssloth, indifference, and general neglect. It'sss a bloody tough job, but it'sss really no different than if one were alive and a ssslave to Father Time. You jussst... forget how to count, eventually." That was the final nail in the coffin, should one let the decay grow that far. There were times where even Fear was astonished at how quickly time flew, but he had gotten a better handle on it thanks to living with... well, the living!

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    Re: A Fishy House Call

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      Current date/time is Wed Jan 23, 2019 8:19 pm